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How a death doula can help your family

A death doula, also known as an end-of-life doula, is a trained professional who provides emotional and practical support to individuals and their families during the end-of-life process. They can be an invaluable resource for your family during the end-of-life process. They understand that this time can be incredibly difficult and emotional for everyone involved, and they strive to provide the necessary support and comfort that can make a significant difference for your loved one who is dying and for your family as a whole.

According to the Kaiser Family Foundation, 70% of people say they would prefer to die at home, but only 30% of people do. While that number is growing, death doulas can help continue to increase the chances of people dying at home by coordinating with healthcare providers and making arrangements for end-of-life care. They understand that this time can be incredibly difficult and emotional for everyone involved, and their main goal is to provide the necessary support and comfort that can make a significant difference for your loved one who is dying and for your family as a whole.

One of the ways a death doula can help is by providing practical and emotional support to the individual who is dying. They can offer companionship and comfort, helping to make the person feel less alone during this difficult time. They understand that the end-of-life process can be an isolating one, and they are there to provide a comforting presence and a listening ear. They can also provide practical assistance with things like medication management and symptom control, helping to make the individual more comfortable.

They can also help you navigate decision-making. They understand that this time can be overwhelming and confusing, and they are there to guide and support you as you navigate the complex medical and legal issues that come with end-of-life care. They can also help coordinate with healthcare providers and make arrangements for end-of-life care, ensuring that the individual's wishes and preferences are respected. Death doulas are trained to understand the importance of honoring your loved one's wishes, and they are there to support you in making sure that they are respected.

If you’re feeling a little lost after your loved one dies, a death doula can also provide support to your family then as well. Not all offer this service, but they may at least have folks to refer you to. They understand that the grieving process can be a difficult and emotional one, and they are there to help with the practical aspects of grief, such as making funeral arrangements. They also provide emotional support as you and your family navigate the grieving process. They understand that everyone grieves differently and they are there to support you in your unique journey. They can also provide guidance and resources for coping with grief and bereavement, understanding that it's a process that can take time and different forms.

What this really comes down to is making sure that your loved one has as close to the death as they desire. A death doula is there to support you and your family through this difficult time, and with their help, you can navigate the end-of-life process with more ease and comfort. They understand the importance of providing emotional and practical support and they are there to support you and your family in every step of the way with empathy and understanding.

Here are a few ways you can find a death doula:

  1. Search online for doula training programs or certification organizations in your area. Some organizations that offer training or certification in death doula work include The International End of Life Doula Association (INELDA) and The National End of Life Doula Alliance (NEDA). These organizations can provide you with a list of certified death doulas in your area.
  2. Check with local hospice or palliative care organizations. Many hospice and palliative care organizations have trained death doulas on staff or have a list of trained death doulas in the community that they can recommend.
  3. Ask for recommendations from healthcare providers or other professionals in the field of end-of-life care. Your doctor, nurse, social worker, or chaplain may know of a death doula in your area and can provide you with a referral.
  4. Look for online resources, communities and forums. Many end-of-life doulas have their own websites, and some may have online presence in social media, communities or forums.
  5. Contact a funeral home or crematory. Some funeral homes and crematories have death doulas on staff or can provide you with a referral to a death doula in the community.

Hiring a death doula can improve the quality of end-of-life care, and make the process less stressful for both patient and family. It's a difficult time for everyone involved, but having the support of a death doula can make all the difference.

Are you a death doula? We're always looking for folks to refer Addio families to. Let's connect! 

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Breena Fain
Breena Fain

Breena is a writer, certified death doula, and co-founder at Addio based in San Francisco. She leads Addio's content efforts and helps families navigate their end-of-life plan. In her free time, you can find her at the piano, on the beach with her dog, eating her weight in sourdough bread, and volunteering at a local SF hospice facility. (She's also who runs all our social media accounts so be sure to say hello!)

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